Friendships Ebook

Making and Keeping Friends

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Making and Keeping Friends Summary


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Perspectives on thinking

Thinking skills (or at least those skilled in thinking) are needed, not only in the worlds of work, education and training, but in the contexts of family, friendship and community and in the construction of personal and shared beliefs and values. There is good evidence that organisations are more successful the more they involve their members in the processes of problem-solving and decision-making. In the 'information age' qualities of independence and flexibility are highly valued and 'learning to learn' has become an important goal. A well-functioning democracy is not only one in which people feel that their views can be freely expressed and are adequately represented but one where those views are informed by reliable information, critical appraisal of ideas, creative thinking and open debate.

Other Cross Sex Relationships

There are no public signs of boyfriend-girlfriend relationships it is difficult to work out husband-wife relationships from public behavior. By contrast, same-sex friendships and family relationships are marked by public signs of casual intimacy holding hands, arms draped across shoulders that are without sexual meaning.

Gender Roles in Economics

In the context of work, partners refer to one another as sits'eni, and when they derive from different family households, or when kinship connections are distant or obscure, the relationship may involve friendship and reciprocity far beyond the domain of work. All-male partnerships, especially in winter, hunt and trap in far-flung zones often dozens of kilometers and many weeks removed from family households in the winter staging communities of past decades or the centralized villages of recent times (Jarvenpa, 1980).

Husband Wife Relationship

While some notion of romantic love may be involved in courtship, this quickly gives way to a rather formal, if not austere, marriage relationship based upon the necessities of livelihood. That is, whether or not friendship and intimacy flourish, Chipewyan marriage is first and foremost a hunting enterprise requiring complementarity of work roles and performances to sustain the family unit. In some cases, adult cross-sex siblings may provide a reliable

Transgender and Transsexualism in Norway

It was founded in January 2000 on three main premises. The most urgent of these was the size of offers from the Norwegian State to transsexuals seeking gender-confirming surgery. The second was the willingness of some transsexuals to display themselves as transsexual women and men, thus generating the power to influence on most levels in society, including the arenas of politics and media. The third reason was the need for transsexuals to come into contact with other transsexuals and or other transpeople, to generate a context where each could find friendships, insights, and addresses of approved therapists in the field. LFTS currently has a membership of 120 individuals. There is the option of a supportive membership with cheaper fees for parents, siblings of transpeople, and any others that might find such a membership meaningful. LFTS does receive economic support from the Norwegian State, but is not yet securely financed.

Extramarital Sex Norms of Extramarital

A minority of cultures also have institutionalized wife-sharing, in which a husband is allowed to lend his wife to a particular other man or category of men. Sometimes, two men exchange wives. Wife-sharing is present in 34 of 101 cultures around the world (Broude, 1981). Typically, a man will share his wife with his kin or with a good friend. In cultures where wife-sharing is practiced, the husband can be expected to reap some kind of benefit from the exchange. Thus, wife-sharing is sometimes practiced to consolidate relationships between two men. For instance, among the Kimam of New Guinea, the feeling of obligation between friends who have lent each other wives is increased so that the men are now expected to help each other in times of need (Serpenti, 1965).

Ahsens Triple Code Model

This psychoanalytic proposition states that one's natural and instinctual aims and behaviors are not directly and completely satisfied but are only partially fulfilled via remote approximations to the target behavior activity. The notion of aim-inhibition attempts to explain the origin of sociable feelings of affection between individuals where the assumption is that if friendships and or affection - say between relatives -were not governed by aim-inhibition, then they

Courtship and Marriage

Informal dating, however, is pursued according to very practical rules, based on shrewd common sense and situational standards. These rules are sometimes provisionally formed by the parties to avoid the pressure of social expectations or the disapproval of one's community. Informal dating may or may not culminate in marriage. Informal dating begins in secrecy, appears to be ad hoc or accidental, and is characterized by public denial of any intimate involvement. In general, informal dating is conducted by individuals who truly love one another but are restricted by prior obligations (e.g., already married, parental or work-unit disapproval, etc.) from publicly acknowledging or expressing their involvement. Within the formal style there can be what we call courtship (a relationship oriented toward marriage) or just plain going out with no stated intent to marry. Although in the case of formal dating an individual may use the services of an introduction agency or friendship networks to...

Cultural Overview

The creation of a Soviet-style one-party state after World War II provided the context for most of the political, economic, social, and cultural features of contemporary Hungary. Politically, Hungary has had four rounds of free elections since the end of the socialist era in 1990, but no government has been reelected and no political ideology has been able to dominate national discourse for long. Two exceptions to this may be a push for traditional Hungarian gender and family roles and the desire to join Europe. Economically, Hungary was transformed during the second half of the 20th century from a largely agrarian country to an urbanized industrial one. Today, 65 of Hungarians live in cities or towns. Unfortunately, since 1990, both the urban and rural work forces have suffered under high rates of inflation, unemployment, and a restructuring of the social service benefits they had grown accustomed to during the socialist era. Some of the most significant of these are education...

Gender Related Social Groups

Other groups that are important in the lives of some Hungarian men are drinking groups, work circles, and peer groups developed during childhood and early adolescence. Hungarian women participate in fitness groups more than men, but less than men in work circles. Fewer women also maintain friendships across the entire life cycle (Reisman, 1990). As in most areas of gender difference, class, education, age, and region are very important in determining an individual's participation in these groups. For example, it is largely young urban women who take fitness classes.

Advantages of the Group

Therapy groups simulate the real world of natural friendship groups more accurately than does individual therapy if the therapist permits and even encourages such simulation. Individual therapy consists solely of a high-status therapist and a low-status client. Due to the greater similarity of the group to other social situations in the real world, the group setting facilitates transfer of newly learned behavior from the therapeutic setting to the community.

Personality Differences by Gender

Kayapo are accepting of a wide range of personality types. The fierceness displayed by men is felt to necessarily be constantly inculcated through magic, ritual, and oratory. Boys and young men constantly engage in verbal and physical contests of one-upmanship, quite differently from their female counterparts. However, by the time men are married, such open competitiveness is frowned upon. Men feel far more affected by rules of social reserve and requirements to act tough and, consequently, women show a more open and easy sociability with other women. Women of different houses, for example, will time their baths in the river so as to socialize together, although this also may act as an impediment to interruptions by menfolk. Every few days women will spend hours painting one another and also gather nightly to sit and chat on the village patio. Men are more openly relaxed outside the more formal constraining context of the village and enjoy nighttime socializing in the men's house...

Scenarios For Discussion

Assume that you do not believe that you can serve as therapist in the light of your close friendship with this person. However, the client points out that not only are you the only one designated to provide therapy under the managed care plan, but that since you are also virtually the only one anywhere near this small community who matches the client in terms of characteristics that the client feels are important (this person believes that only someone who matches the patient's gender, race, and sexual orientation will understand the issues and be able to help), the client cannot really get help from anyone but you. How do you address this What are your options What steps would you take

Cross Sex Relationships

This hierarchy of feeling and affection is ubiquitous in the American polygynous family. There is a gradation of emotional affiliation and intensity in affection and loyalty between full and half-siblings. However, this does not mean that half-siblings never form close bonds with other half-siblings. Nonetheless, there is an overwhelming preference for full siblings to form more intimate patterns of solidarity. Generally, it is the later born siblings (i.e., a mother's last two offsprings) who are more likely to establish a close friendship with the comother's children. Thus, half-siblings attend family functions out of friendship bonds previously established, whereas full siblings attend for a variety of reasons ranging from obligation to deep affection.

More Radical Extirpation or Removal of Emotions

The attraction of the Stoic view rests in its powerful description of the anguish of the engaged emotional life. Many emotions (though not all) lead to attachment, but objects of attachment are never perfectly stable. Abandonment, separation, failure, and loss are the constant costs of love, effort, and friendship. The more tightly we cling to our investments, the more dependent we become upon what is uncontrolled and outside our own mastery. Self-reproach and persecution are often responses to lack of control. In our relations with others, the same clinginess of emotions can lead to stepping beyond what is appropriate, just as it can lead to exclusionary preferences and partialities. Provincialism can grow out of stubborn preference for what is familiar and comfortable according to class lines or other restrictive values.

Looking for support from groups

Nearly every large city has support groups for women with endometriosis your weekend paper often lists the meeting times and locations. Or you can call your local hospitals to find out if they sponsor support groups. The drawback to support groups is their limited meeting schedule (usually only once a month), but you can make friends there that you can talk with more frequently. If you're not comfortable talking about your disease face to face in a social setting, check out the next section, which may be just what you're looking for.

Parental and Other Caretaker Roles

Biological mothers and fathers are the primary caregivers for children, but from birth both girl and boy babies are cared for and socialized by an extensive network of family. Older siblings, especially sisters, spend a great deal of time carrying, feeding, and entertaining children. Grandparents, aunts, and cousins often play important caretaking and socializing roles too. Though women spend the most time with babies and children, and are thus the primary physical caregivers and discipliners, both men and women are openly affectionate and tender with youngsters, and both take responsibility for guiding and socializing their children. Babies are cherished as gifts from Onoruame (God) and are closely attended, breast-fed, and seldom out of bodily contact with their caregivers. Children stay near home or close to their mother or sisters as babies and toddlers, but by the age of 4 or 5 are considered to begin thinking well enough to venture out accompanied by siblings or other children,...

Displacedincestuous Triangles

Displaced-incestuous triangles do not involve love (or sex) between members of the same family rather, two family members share the same lover (either simultaneously or sequentially). Woody Allen's movie Hannah and Her Sisters was a virtual celebration of interlocking triangles and emotions. In the film, the two key triangles involve Hannah (Mia Farrow), who is portrayed as happy, mature, and envied by her two sisters. Hannah's husband (Michael Caine) lusts after her beautiful and sexy sister Lee (Barbara Hershey), who succumbs to his advances. (In the end, it turns out that he really loved Hannah all along and he stays with her.) Meanwhile, Hannah fixes up her previous husband (Woody Allen) with her coked-up discombobulated sister Holly (Dianne Wiest), with disastrous results. This misadventure is later redeemed when Holly and the ex-husband accidentally meet again, fall in love, and decide to marry. Essentially, then, each of Hannah's sisters sleeps with one of her husbands. (And...

Case Illustration

Other issues included difficulties trusting others, feelings of inadequacy, dysfunctional eating, and alcohol use. During initial sessions, Briana's therapist also asked questions about family and relationship interaction patterns, paying special attention to shoulds and beliefs that appeared related to gender dynamics in her family, friendships, and school experiences. When the therapist (Jean) inquired about the presence of past trauma or victimization, which is one aspect of gender-role analysis, Briana reluctantly revealed being the target of sexualized comments during her high school and college years and an unwanted sexual experience during her second year in college. After inquiring further about these experiences, Jean hypothesized that Briana coped with these unresolved events by minimizing the significance of these events. Her use of alcohol, eating issues, and her anxieties represented survival skills related to Briana's efforts to cope with events that might be...

Change in Attitudes Beliefs and Practices Regarding Gender

In some parts of Brazilian territory the Yanomami have suffered tremendously from the intrusion of illegal miners. Again and again the Yanomami are being threatened by the presence of prospectors as well as by the Brazilian Armed Forces. Sexual relations between foreigners and Yanomami women result in the spread of venereal disease. Sexual relations, which are traditionally a form of generosity embedded in a complex of friendship and alliance, now threaten death and social instability on a large scale.

Behavioral Strategies and Relapse Prevention

Emotional and relational problems If needed, the therapist might explain how emotional or relational difficulties are linked to gambling problems and discuss ways in which the client can resolve these difficulties. Social skills training is useful, for example, when gamblers have difficulty saying no to an invitation to gamble. Social skills training can teach clients how to refuse such invitations. For others, gambling activities might conceal difficulties with establishing social contacts or maintaining friendships. Learning how to develop new, mutually rewarding social ties might in these cases aid clients in abstaining from gambling.

Locus Of Control Theory

The German-born zoologist physiologist Jacques Loeb (1859-1924) formulated a theory of the tro-pism as applied to animal behavior. The term tropism refers to any unlearned movement or orientation of an organic unit as a whole toward a source of stimulation cf., phototro-pism, which means turning toward light heliotropism is movement toward the sun, geotropism is a simple orienting response, either negative or positive, to the lines of force of gravity, and galvanotropism is a simple orienting response, either negative or positive, to electrical stimulation the genotropism doctrine - first proposed by the Hungarian genet-ist psychoanalyst Leopold Szondi (18931977), states that latent recessive genes determine instinctive or spontaneous choices, such as those in friendship, love, occupation, illness, and manner of death, and underlie the attraction between people who share the same genes . Modern convention reserves the term tropism for plants and the term taxis...

Empirical Questions And Studies

Compared to the abundance of self-help books and manuals available, the evaluation of these materials is skimpy in terms of whether they do more good than harm. For example, do they really help people achieve what they promise Self-help books differ in the clarity with which hoped-for outcomes are described. Promising self-fulfillment is vague compared to helping readers lose weight, get better grades, or make friends. Self-help books differ in the evidentiary base of their views about how self-change can be achieved ranging from material that appeals to will power in motivating change (notoriously ineffective), to those that rely on empirical findings regarding what has been found to contribute to self-change. Research on self-management and self-instruction suggests that some methods and formats are more likely than others to facilitate self-help efforts. Key As with any claim, we should carefully examine the extent to which it has been critically tested. For example, is there any...

Hasan Aziz and Zarin Mogal

For persons with epilepsy, there is no legal restriction on education. Most of the problems are related to the societal attitude. Educational opportunities are usually denied to persons with epilepsy42 and are not allowed to attend school.38 Even, teachers who are aware of the nature of the medical condition, insist on complete control of seizures before allowing the child to school. This is probably due to the pressure from parents of other children.45 In China a sizeable number of parents would not like their children having any association with persons with epilepsy in school or at play.33 Similar attitude is also observed in Denmark, a developed country.29 In Senegal epilepsy is considered contagious, forcing children with epilepsy to stay away from school.23 It appears that there is a change in this trend with time. Well-educated people in high positions are less prejudiced against their children studying and having friendship with children with epilepsy.25 However, many teachers...

Objections to an Ethic of Care

Images of women as concerned with serving and pleasing others (Card, 1991). Feminist critics also warn that caring cannot function as an ethic that is complete unto itself. Observing that caring can be exploited in the service of immoral ends (Card, 1990, p. 106), Card insists on the need to balance caring with justice and other values. Exclusive attention to caring can also lead to overlooking the lack of care of women for women and may preclude the possibility of our looking at anything but love and friendship in women's emotional responses to one another (Spellman, p. 216). Finally, excessive focus on caring at the expense of other values can blind us to the critical assessment of the object of caring. As Warren Thomas Reich noted in 2001, care by itself can be easily manipulated, and does not offer tools for analyzing the moral importance of what we care about.

Criticisms of Autonomy

However, a society in which no one does more or less than respect everyone else's liberal rights, in which there is no caring, love, or friendship and no neighborhood associations, political parties, or civic groups, is not one we would want, though it may be a liberal society (Gutmann). On the other hand, a society organized to promote civic virtues and obligations such as beneficence, caring, and compassion, but which does not recognize a right of individuals to be different, to make their own decisions about matters of importance to them or to find a style of life that makes them happy, is also not one we would want. Love and care can be stifling if they do not recognize an individual's own view of what his or her good is. Finally, a defensible theory of the nature and value of individual autonomy will fall between radical individualism and extreme collectivism. It must explain the obligations to create and maintain social and political institutions that support the exercise and...

Leisure Recreation and the Arts

Both adult men's and women's friendships are largely instrumental rather than emotional in Hungary (Toth, 1993), men's even more than women's (Albert & David, 1998). Hungarian men also spend more time in the company of friends and colleagues than women do and they go out more often (Albert & David, 1998). Male leisure activities include home crafts and building, attending sporting events, watching television, and listening to music, and for some younger men, surfing the internet and other computer activities (Wolf, 2000). In addition, heavy drinking is also considered a socially acceptable male activity. Nearly 22 of men in the late 1990s drank alcohol every day the figure for women was only 2.9 (Pongracz & Toth, 1999).

The Effects of Kinship on Female Status in Marriage

Local marriage contracts, identified as buying a woman or stepping on the bride-to-be symbolize a woman's transfer from her parents' home and control to that of her husband and his family. The general pattern is one in which male solidarity is reinforced when women join their husband's family. At the beginning of a marriage a woman has yet to form the new alliances and friendships with her husband's female relatives and therefore she has very little support. However, several factors affect a woman's relative authority. The first factor is that the longer she remains in her husband's household and bears his children, the more consideration and respect she receives. If she lives to old age, her husband's family members will consider her an elder of their line. If she outlives her husband she might even be considered a senior elder in her husband's lineage, with the authority to select names for the newest members of the family. A second factor is that she can gain respect and authority...

Marriage Arrangements Brideprice Grooms Service and Tradition Based Marriage Ceremonies

Patrilineage and assumed membership in her husband's father's household. Her name, once included among those in her father's line, could be added to the roster of names in her husband's lineage. She began instructions from her mother-in-law and her husband's patrilateral aunts (his father's unmarried sisters and his father's brothers' wives). Her husband's family then expected her to allow her girlhood friendships and ties with the female relatives of her father's lineage to diminish and new friendships to develop with his unmarried sisters and his sisters-in-law. When a bride received meat brought home by her husband and his male relatives to distribute, she was expected to distribute to the women of her husband's lineage, while it remained her husband's respectful duty to make sure that his new bride's mother received some of his catch.

Rehearsals For Love Crushes Infatuations Flirtations And Fantasies

Though they may find a range of satisfactions in one-sided crushes, adolescents hunger even more for intense relationships and those that, because they are reciprocal, may yield real experience and intimacy. These are the years of progressively forming new identifications outside the nuclear family, and one major means of doing so is by taking one's measure in intense friendships. Adolescents idealize their friends and imitate their dress and mannerisms, their swagger and cool. Parents are sometimes saddened because they feel the loss of their children's idealization and see the admiration and authority that had been vested

Dominantsubmissive Adaptations Among Couples

In addition to their almost ritualized roles and rationalizations, they also contrived to have a good friend in attendance most of the time. This was sometimes his mentor, sometimes a soulful friend of one or the other, but always someone who cared for them both and perceived them as a loving couple. This third party was part confessor, part conciliator, but in whatever capacity served a strategic function to validate the existence of their love should their own belief in it ever waiver. While this maneuver appears to triangulate the relationship, its mode was not Oedipal that is, the third person was never a potential rival for either of them. Instead he (or she) served the roles of externalized conscience and guarantor of the relationship. A large part of the couple's psychological investment was in the couple itself, in the we they presented to the world.

Description Of Treatment

Assertion training usually consists of a variety of components, including instruction, model presentation, behavior rehearsal, feedback, programming of change, and homework assignments. Other procedures that may also be used, depending on what is found during assessment, include self-instruction training, relaxation training, cognitive restructuring (e.g., decreasing unrealistic expectations or beliefs), and interpersonal problem-solving training (helping clients to effectively handle challenging situations that arise in social situations such as reactions of anger that get in the way of maintaining friendships). Written material may be used to provide instructions and to clarify differences among aggressive, assertive, and passive behaviors in a situation. For example if you believe you have been treated unfairly by a professor, you could appropriately speak to your instructor about your concerns (be assertive), say nothing (be passive), or yell at the instructor (be aggressive)....

Psychological Presentations

In addition to the presenting physical symptoms, psychological manifestations may be detected on emergency evaluation. Depression, including suicidal ideation, is the primary psychological complication of eating disorders. Other psychological manifestations include obsessive-compulsive personality traits, with rumination about food, calories, and weight. Ritualistic eating and exercising behavior are also evident. Perfectionistic striving often results in deterioration of friendships and leisure activities.

Ethical Implications

The rapid aging of society will reshape relationships within the family as parent-child relationships extend over many more years and pose new challenges in later life. Although most agree that parents undertake special duties toward offspring, there are different opinions as to whether grown children have corresponding duties toward aging parents. For example, Jane English denies that adult offspring owe their parents anything by virtue of being their offspring. Instead, she defends the idea that the duties of grown children are those of friends, and result from love between them and their parent, rather than being things owed in repayment for the parents' earlier sacrifices (English, p. 147). Others object to special duties of any form, whether founded on friendship, filial status, citizenship, or other bases. The favoritism implied by special duties is sometimes considered logically or psychologically at odds with the ethical requirements of impartiality and...

Introduction to BDD

Therapists can also highlight the impact of cognitions and behavior on emotion and the role of avoidance in the maintenance of the symptoms and the disorder (Wilhelm, Otto, Lohr, & Deckersbach, 1999). For example, a woman who is concerned about her long disjointed nose begins avoid dating and developing friendships, thus preventing herself from gathering disconfirming evidence. She may also be experiencing intrusive self-defeating thoughts such as I look like Pinocchio, which can alter one's mood and create feelings of depression and disgust. Those feelings may lead to her engaging in depressed behaviors such as isolating herself from friends and loved ones. Selective attention and recall also plays a role in the maintenance of BDD symptoms. Individuals with BDD selectively focus on their distorted internal body image, assuming their image is an accurate depiction, and conclude that others see this too (Veale, 2002). For example, the woman concerned about her long bumpy noise may only...

Assertion Training

The aim of assertion training is to enhance interpersonal effectiveness in social situations. Positive consequences may be forgone because of anxiety in social situations. Assertion training emphasizes the extent to which we can influence our social environment by being active in its construction. In 1973 Joseph Wolpe defined assertive behavior as The proper expression of any emotion other than anxiety toward another person. Lack of effective social skills may result in a variety of maladaptive behaviors. Assertion training often in combination with other methods, has been used to address a wide variety of presenting complaints including substance abuse, aggressive and explosive behaviors, and obsessive-compulsive behaviors. It has been used to help people make friends, arrange dates, and acquire needed help (e.g., on the part of individuals with learning disabilities). Essentially, assertive skills are effective social influence skills acquired through learning.

Case Example 1

Ten-year-old Amy had a history of sabotaging her friendships by her passive-aggressively expressed critical stance toward others she would roll her eyes mockingly, make a low-voiced angry comment, or fail to interpret correctly the social cues given by other children. Amy experienced herself as endlessly falling victim to the meanness of others, whether it was to her classmates' cattiness or to her parents' unfairness. When her attention was forcefully drawn to these reported problems, she would respond at first with denial and then would sadly insist that she couldn't help being so angry because my parents are divorced. Amy's relationship with her therapist was dominated by her need to present herself as a nice cheerful girl who enjoyed coming to therapy to play cards. A year of once-weekly psychodynamic psychotherapy had not allowed Amy to make any real progress she remained as insistent as ever that the world had dealt her a bad hand of cards and that other people should change. A...


In this view, the pleasure in shared laughter is analogous to the pleasure of actual physical touch. Humor has in fact been characterized as a form of vicarious touch. The importance of touch for primate emotional development is well documented. Laughter may have served to attract like-minded others in the bonding process as Konrad Lorenz noted, finding the same thing funny is not only a prerequisite to a real friendship but also very often the first step to its formation. Thus, just as language facilitates social bonding, laughter accompanying speech, and humorous discourse with or without laughter, could have evolved as a way of solidifying affectional bonds.


Incapable of friendship with human subjects. From this it has been deduced that humans have no direct duties to animals because they are not moral subjects of worth in themselves. Many contemporary secular theories, for example, contractualism, owe their origin to this developing Scholastic view that animals do not form part of a moral community with human beings.

Electrical Aversion

D., aged 27, reported the presence of jealous obsessions since her first emotional relationship with a man when she was 18. The thought that her boyfriend could be sexually attracted or in love with another woman preoccupied her almost continuously and was extremely distressing. It would cause her to repeatedly accuse the boyfriend of being in love with other women but only staying with her because he felt obliged to. His assurance that he was not would only briefly relieve her of the thought that as she said the terrible things in my mind are true. If between relationships she formed a friendship with a woman she considered attractive, when she met a new boyfriend she would cut off the relationship with the woman, for fear the boyfriend would find her attractive. Also she would put pressure on her boyfriend to limit any kind of social interactions with women she saw as attractive. This behavior had frequently caused boyfriends to whom she was...


Theophrastus (371-286 B.C.) was a Greek philosopher who asserted a close mental kinship between humans and nonhuman animals. Born in Er-esus on Lesbos, he studied at Athens under Aristotle, eventually succeeding him as head of the school (Lyceum) from 322. Although much of his output is now lost, sizable portions of his On Piety were preserved by Porphyry* (Sorabji, Animal Minds, 175) and make clear his view that we owe animals justice, and also that it is wrong to sacrifice animals and, explicitly, to eat meat. Theophrastus is modern in his insistence not only that it is wrong to cause suffering to animals, but also that killing is unjust because it robs animals of their life. Unlike his teacher Aristotle, who held that animals could not form part of the moral community because they were incapable of rational friendship, Theophrastus maintained that animals enjoy kinship with humans and therefore deserve moral solicitude.


I was afterwards to make many friends on the other side of the Atlantic. There was the much loved Margaret Rawson. Margaret lived from 1899 to 2001, dying at the age of 102, after spanning three centuries. Other good friends included Dr Richard Masland, who, like Dr Critchley, was at one time the President of the World Federation of Neurology, and his wife Mary (Molly) Masland. There was also Dr Sally Childs, a staunch defender of the Gillingham Stillman programme. I was also very lucky to have the opportunity of meeting with Dr Norman Geschwind, an inspirational and innovative neurologist. There was also Dr Albert Galaburda (one of the first people to carry out post-mortem examinations of the brains of those known to be dyslexic in their lifetime), Dr Drake Duane, Roger Saunders, Thomas West, Dr C. K. Leong, Dr Dwight Knox, Professor P. G. Aaron and, most recently, Dr Leonore Ganschow, a psychologist interested both in language learning and in the reading of music (see Ganschow et...

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